Sledge Hammer To The Face

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I thought Homer Simpson was the only person stupid enough to actually look for the “ANY” key, but apparently I was wrong.

“I think I’ll order a TAB”

Wow… why is it so funny that I hear this same exact shit every day. I didn’t know that this happened any where else?

Watch it until the end… it gets even funnier at the end.

This isn’t really a SHTTF, but it was too funny not to post

Thanks to tim for the video

I guess this does prove that asian men have small penises.  I’m not sure that any one else in the world would look at that bench and think that the holes in it would be about the right size to have sex with.

Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.

The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.

Read more…

And he tries writting a review to get his money back… whoops!

About the app…

“What is in our water supply… what is in our air supply that is causing rainbows to form in sprinklers?”

Wow… no wonder George Bush got elected twice… fucking idiots like this posting shit like this on line. I wonder if she knows about wikipedia?

Thanks to Matt for the video

Southern California gives us more than its fair share of strange cultural fads. Just look at the Valley Girl. Oh My God! Gag me with a Meat Cleaver! Or Gangsta Rap/Culture.

Not to be outdone, NorCal (Northern California for those who don’t understand modern vernacular) has to contribute their own brand of stupidity. They call it “Hyphy”, a culture involving uptempo bass heavy hip hop and mayhem. Anything that trace its roots to MC Hammer is going to end. Badly.

In addition to (because of?) drug abuse (”Thizz”, a combination of MDMA and Meth, or “Sizzurp”, which is basically robitussin DM), some followers of Hyphy choose to “Ghost Ride The Whip”, where the occupants of a motor vehicle exit and dance on and around said motor vehicle while it is in motion.

For those of you who don’t understand why this is a bad idea, I present you with the following videos:

I picture the gene pool cleaning itself right about now…

I love how they all cheer like some one didn’t almost just get run over!

From the SHTTF archives:

We all know politicians are human like the rest of us, prone to acting out with vices when the pressure gets to be too much. Jesse Helms was known to pass out Lucky Strikes like candy to visitors, Ted Kennedy likes his drink, and Bill Clinton likes his cigars.

But being Mayor of Washington, DC must be super stressful, because it leads to smoking crack. Well, it was that stressful 18 years ago, when this video was taken.

His friend: “I get hyper, too nervous, too hyper. I can’t bring my thoughts back together right away. I’m on weed right now, too.”

The FBI break in the door roughly 7 and a half minutes into the video.

Apparently being high on crack makes you ramble like Rain Man when you get caught. “Definitely set up. Ain’t that a bitch. Set me up. Bitch set me up. Definitely.”

This guy was so high he thought it would be funny to place a bet using pot on a game with “bud” in the name. Whoops!

Inside the Casino 1 venue in downtown Fresno, California, the player reached into his pocket and produced an ounce of marijuana buds. Realising he might have overbet slightly, he then emptied out a handful of them onto the table, leaving the dealer slightly confused. After his arrest, the stoner then attempted to claim what he had done was legal as he had a Cannabis Club card he’d got from the internet.

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Checklist of items to save in case of flood: Keystone, bud light, diet 7up, bud heavy… what else am I missing?

Hopefully that 7up willsave them from dying of dehydration. Welcome to NASCAR country!

(Click the image to see the full size version)

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